Well today started out like most of my work days, with a shower. My neighbor’s bathroom is next to mine on the other side of the wall. Whenever I hear her toilet flush and I am taking a shower I get nervous. Today I thought I smelled something and decided to try to sniff the water coming down on me as I showered. Doing this caused me to basically waterboard myself. After that I decided to stop at a gas station for a pack of smokes. The total came to $7.16. I gave the lady eight single dollars. She looked at them, gasp and said under her breath…” Oh Man”…. As if counting eight dollars was one of the toughest challenges in her 30 year life.
On a side note I really hate the NBA. Not only is basketball a dumb sport but .. well it’s a dumb sport. Why did the lockout have to end? I was looking forward to 20-30 new rappers hitting the market and a “Kazaam” or two being released.…..
I have decided that I am going to grow a mustache. People don’t take me serious enough. Example…. I asked two of my co workers to write down who they think are the top 5 worst comedians of all time…. I did the same.
Co Worker 1 (hippy) answer= I don’t know any comedians
Co Worker 2 (dick) answer=
1. Dane Cook
2. Cook, Dane
3. Mr. Dane Cook
4. Mister Dane Cook
5. Mr. Cook, Dane
Although I agree with him here are my picks from least sucky (yet still sucky) to all out porn star quality suck
5- Carlos Mencia.. He was funny when he was stealing other comedians jokes…I will give him that.
4- Nick Cannon- You should probably be lower on this list but I dont feel like editing it
3- Carrot Top- Gallagher wannabe……Roided up…. Its hard to be worse of a comedian then this guy… which makes our top two so special.
2- NORM MCDONALD- No idea how he EVER got on tv. I would rather have a Turkish Diplomat finger my asshole then listen or see this guy.
1- DANE COOK- I dare someone to find a funny clip of Dane Cook online. It would take you years..maybe a lifetime of searching, because it does NOt exist….This man is horrible. They should play Dane Cook skits to people in gitmo…(CIA you can use this advice) or to animals in zoos they want to off themselves.
More Advice. Girls stop tanning so damn much. I’m not a racist, but I really don’t like orange women…..
Has everyone kept their New Years resolution so far??? Fun Fact= Candy cigarettes are a gateway drug to rock candy.. banned in the state of Connecticut in 2003 along with the freedom to keep town records kept where liquor is sold…………